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Anger, as I mentioned in my earlier blog is a natural phenomenon and triggered by various internal and external factors. It takes some time to change our internal factors and it is more difficult to change these internal factors unless we change the external factors or the environment.
On the lighter side, it was once while discussing about controlling anger I told a gentleman to find out the external factors that triggers his anger and change it. After a pause he asked me “Can I change my wife?”
Coming back to point, you do not really have to change your wife/husband.
There are other ways for easing up on you:
Timing: If you and your spouse tend to fight when you discuss things at night—perhaps you're tired, or distracted, or maybe it's just habit—try changing the times when you talk about important matters so these talks don't turn into arguments.
Avoidance: If your child's chaotic room makes you furious every time you walk by it, shut the door. Don't make yourself look at what infuriates you. Don't say, "Well, my child should clean up the room so I won't have to be angry!" That's not the point. The point is to keep you calm.
Finding alternatives: If your daily commute through traffic leaves you in a state of rage and frustration, give yourself a project—learn or map out a different route, one that's less congested or more scenic. Or find another alternative, such as a bus or commuter train.
On the lighter side, it was once while discussing about controlling anger I told a gentleman to find out the external factors that triggers his anger and change it. After a pause he asked me “Can I change my wife?”
Coming back to point, you do not really have to change your wife/husband.
There are other ways for easing up on you:
Timing: If you and your spouse tend to fight when you discuss things at night—perhaps you're tired, or distracted, or maybe it's just habit—try changing the times when you talk about important matters so these talks don't turn into arguments.
Avoidance: If your child's chaotic room makes you furious every time you walk by it, shut the door. Don't make yourself look at what infuriates you. Don't say, "Well, my child should clean up the room so I won't have to be angry!" That's not the point. The point is to keep you calm.
Finding alternatives: If your daily commute through traffic leaves you in a state of rage and frustration, give yourself a project—learn or map out a different route, one that's less congested or more scenic. Or find another alternative, such as a bus or commuter train.
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